You know, I’m in a bad mood.
Actually, I’ve been in a bad mood, off and on, for a few weeks now.
Ever have those times where it just feels like you can’t do anything right? Like everyone hates you? I hate that.
No, this isn’t a whiny whine. I’m just venting and being grumpy.
The other night we had dinner with some lovely new friends. Great food, great company, great…wine. Too much wine. I spent all day Sunday barely able to move, and I really hate it when that happens. It isn’t just feeling physically bad that bothers me, it’s the mental bad. The “I am soooo irresponsible and a horrible person, what is the matter with me, how could I do that to myself” mental bad. And worse, even, is the suspicion that most normal proper adults don’t ever drink too much and get hung over, or if they do, they just feel bad and maybe beat themsleves up for drinking too much, but don’t spend the next week cursing themselves for being assholes and wondering why they can’t be like everyone else. I suspect they just say, “Yeah, oops!” and sort of giggle and get on with it.
It seems, also, that I am constantly offending people these days without meaning to. I made a jokey comment on another blog a couple of days ago which apparently some people took personally, and I feel horrible about it, really really awful. It (the comment) wasn’t really that bad, I guess, but I feel like a complete ass and like everyone is talking about me. I tried to clarify but have no idea if anyone read it.
Hubby’s back at work. The days are long and dark and cold.
Is this just a fall malaise/Mercury retrograde thing?
Of course, all the spam I’ve been getting lately might be the answer. Apparently if I am “tired with weak penis” there’s a pill out there just for me! Generally, if I’m tired, weak is the way I want the penis to be. Maybe that’s just me, though.
Then there’s the amazing, mile-long spam message I got on the blog yesterday, or the day before. I wasn’t online much Sunday or yesterday so I don’t know for sure which day it came in. But it was seriously the longest bit of nonsense I’ve ever seen. Why do I keep getting this anonymous spam? There’s no freaky, fun links to check out. I get anonymous Bible verses, or that idiot who told me my back hurting was punishment for exposing myself to children or whatever the hell semi-literate shit they’d gotten in their pea-sized brains, or yesterday. Which was this enormous, nonsensical diatribe about vengeful gods and the US being a blight and Artificial Intelligence or some shit like that, written in a literary style so turgid it almost gave me cyctitis.
So there you go. I’m sure I’ll be back to my happy little self tomorrow. The good news is, hubs and I have gotten back into watching The Dead Zone–we’re only on Season 2–which is awesome. Such a good show, and we’re having a really good time. We love the movie, too. “The ice…is gonna break!”