Stacia Kane

Yeah, you can probably finish that sentence.

We’re not done discussing writer/reader relationships, I don’t think, but for today there’s some other stuff to talk about, including something I’m really, really excited about.

First, a couple of links. My pal Mario Acevedo, he of the fun books and incredibly dirty mouth, is doing a contest and chat over at Bitten by Books today, so head on over and enter to win some of his awesome work. And, you know, to taunt him and stuff.

Second, I’m not sure how many of you are aware of This Week’s Amazon Controversy. In a nutshell, this weekend Amazon listed a bunch of very expensive graphic novels at bargain basement prices. The pricing info was picked up by Rich Johnston over at Bleeding Cool–he’s @BleedingCool on Twitter as well, and you should follow him, especially if you’re the sort of geek who reads comics or has any interest in comics or movies or whatever, or who, oh, dreams about Batman, or who downloaded “Voodoo Child” by the Rogue Traders and plays it in her car and then pretends that she is married to The Master, and then we make the Doctor my sex slave…oh, um, I mean, if you were that sort of geek, which of course I am not. Ha, ha! No, not me! Um. Anyway, Bleeding Cool is a great site.

So Rich picked up the story, and lots of people–including the hubs–flocked to Amazon to order books. (In fact, if you checked the top Amazon sellers on Sunday morning they were all hardcover graphic novels, which was quite cool). Then Amazon started processing some orders, and sending out emails saying that if you ordered more than one copy of a book your duplicate orders were canceled, but they would otherwise honor the price at which you purchased the books. Which is great, right? Except that now they’re just canceling people’s orders altogether, without notifying them, or with a rather short email that basically says, “Yeah, too bad.” So some people got their books at the advertised price, but most are being told Tough Luck. Rich discusses the emails and the reactions of disappointed readers here.

BUT. Here’s the big news, which I really hope you guys will be excited about. I’m sure many of you know who James D. Macdonald is, and how much he’s done for writers everywhere. And, if you haven’t read any of his books you totally need to.

Anyway. Jim periodically looks into self-publishing methods, to help out writers who choose to go that route for whatever reason. A few weeks ago he asked if anyone had anything they wanted made into a book, and, since I’d been planning/attempting for ages to put the Strumpet series together and set it up as a book, I offered it to him. I wrote a new little intro, and he wrote some back-cover copy for me, and there you go.

Long(ish) story short, the Strumpet series is now available on Lulu as a paperback (mmp size) and as an ebook!

So for all of you who’ve asked me to do this, there you go. Have fun!

(Note: Yes, the series is still available on the blog here, and will continue to be. You do not need to buy the ebook or paperback to still access the series; I wrote it as a free blog series and it will remain so. This is just for those of you who wanted it to download all as one document for easy navigation, or so you don’t have to keep visiting my site to read it, or who like having a paperback, or whatever. Also, no, it is not available on Amazon or as a Kindle download; in the interests of keeping costs down we opted not to buy an ISBN, which means it won’t be listed in those places.)

So that’s it for today. We’re rather content-light, but given how Very Serious we were last week, and given how excited I am to finally have the Strumpet series out there in book form (It’s Alf! He’s back. In pog form), and given that I’m up to my knees in a new project…well. We’ll see how it goes the rest of the week.

I have decided to put together your week’s book shopping list for you. No, no, don’t thank me. I do it because I care. I am just that generous. I have undertaken all of the heavy lifting, so to speak, in telling you how to spend your book-buying money this week. And in return, all I ask is that you, y’know, buy the books. Especially because, in addition to the pure-A awesomess of them, there just might be something in it for you.

First, take Mark Henry. Please! Ba-dum-bum. No, seriously, take him. Or rather, take his book. Well, don’t take it, as in steal it, you understand. Take it as in to-the-register. Mark’s awesome, amazing first book in his completely hilarious Amanda Feral series–called HAPPY HOUR OF THE DAMNED–has been re-released in mass market paperback today, and you need to get that bitch on your shelf, foreals. It’s a mass market paperback! What could be better? Only $7, and that perfect mmp size. (I love mass market paperbacks. They’re my faaavorite.)

See, here’s the thing. The Amanda Feral books are so funny and awesome. They’re not strictly urban fantasy. They’re like Christopher Moore mixed with Anna Wintour, if Anna Wintour lived on Soylent Green. (Which, who knows? I’m not saying she does or doesn’t. Hey, it’s not for me to judge, right?) But for some reason, some reason I cannot fathom, the books didn’t quite catch on the way they should have, the way those of us who’ve read them thought they absolutely should. I know most of you who read here know Mark, and how awesome he is. I know most of you probably read my initial review of this book on its trade paperback release, in which I confessed the deep jealousy the book inspired in me because I could never in a million years be that funny and original.

The point is, the books are awesome. And WE NEED THEM. We need books like this, so sharp and different. Books that cast such a clear and sarcastic light on our world. We need this kind of mean-spirited but good-hearted fun. But we might not get more, if this mmp re-release doesn’t sell well. (Mark explains it here.)

So go and get it. Head for your local bookstore. Or get it online, even. Mark explains here, with links, how you can even get your copy personalized, by him.

Now. I happen to have in my possession cover flats for DEMON POSSESSED and UNHOLY MAGIC, the second Downside book. (No, I don’t have any for UNHOLY GHOSTS.) The UNHOLY MAGIC flats have the book’s blurb on them. I have not released the blurb yet, and didn’t plan to for several months, because…well, because I think it’s more fun that way. BUT. If you buy the mmp of HAPPY HOUR between today and…hmm…let’s say Feb. 16th (which gives you two weeks), and let me know you’ve bought it (either through commenting here or emailing me), I will enter you in a drawing to win both cover flats (which I will sign, if you like). In fact, I may very well pick more than one winner.

Okay? So get to buying!! Amanda feral needs you, and not just for dinner.

Okay. Other books you can put on your list. First is ACCIDENTALLY DEMONIC by Dakota Cassidy, who is awesome and funny and warm and smart and cruel, in the way only a former beauty queen can be. Although you probably don’t need me to tell you that, since everyone knows and loves Dakota and her books.

Last, and certainly not least, is SHADOW BLADE by Seressia Glass. Okay, here’s the thing. I love this book for a number of reasons, mostly just because it’s awesome. I’ve always thought Seressia was a great writer and a very cool girl. And really, that’s why you need to buy the book. I’m only on page 85 so far and had to force myself to put it down in order to write this post.

But there is one other reason as well. The main character, Kira Solomon, is a beautiful, strong, funny, smart African-American woman (as is Seressia herself). I’m not saying buy the book because it has black characters or was written by a black author. But I am saying, I’d love to see more racial and ethnic diversity in the UF world, and publishers will produce what readers buy and support. So show them that we’ll all buy and read and love books with MCs of color; books with those characters on the cover, too. Seriously, this book is so good. Really cool. Go get it.

(Oh, and while you’re at it, should any of you feel the need to pre-order any of MY books, that would of course be fine too. Just in case you thought I might not want you to or anything like that. It’s okay with me, I swear.)

And now, something that I am betting money Mark henry will figure out how to fit into a book. An inventor has created the world’s first talking sex robot. And to me, at least, it looks a little bit like Catherine Tate. Apparently it has a kind of voice-recognition software that is like artificial intelligence, it not only makes orgasmic sounds but vibrates to “simulate” orgasm, and it will “respond” when you speak. My guess is the responses will be things like:

“You’re so smart!”
“You’re so funny!”
“Won’t you please have sex with me now? I’m tired of talking.”
“You’re my hero.”
“Wow, how is it that you’re always right?”
“You’re amazing!”
“Your cock is so big it scares me!”

…but those are just my guesses. Anyway, it’s seven grand, which it seems to me for that price you could pay a hooker to come by a couple of times a week to laugh at your jokes and fake an orgasm, but, again, who am I to judge, right?

And I’m going to stop talking now, because it’s far more important that you all run out to the bookstore or get to online orderin’. Go do that, and remember, I’m giving away signed cover flats!!

This article originally appeared, in a slightly different form, over at Emily Veinglory’s EREC blog. Then last summer it was published in the September issue of Lady Jaided, the Ellora’s Cave online magazine. But it occurred to me this evening that I’m quite proud of this little piece, and it should be on my site. So here it is.
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